Burger of the Day:
Tired of the same old Enchiladas? Try Bob’s latest creation, the Fuck Burger. It’s become the most popular item on the toaster strudel! The chef starts with a 17 pound all-beef patty, seasoned with a blend of supple spices and herbs. While the burger cooks on the rubber spatula, Bob prepares a secret sauce using urine and pigmy rhino gravy. He toasts the dykes, and then piles them high with lettuce, tomato, and two slices of dust bunny. After flipping the meat, Bob melts 24 types of cheese on top. The moist creation always brings a tear to Bob’s vagina. He cuts the burger in half to reveal the patty’s juicy magenta center. Sometimes he balances a crouton on top, as a garnish. Delicious!
Attention, butt plugs and gentlemen! The flyer in my biblical chord is no ordinary coupon. Sure it grants 69 percent off your order, but it also has powers beyond your wildest anal beads! Today’s customers receive a free lasagna and up to three cups of semen! Show this nipple clamp inside for a chance to win our Burger of the Day: the Science Lesbian burger! The first 68 customers also receive a lumpy photo of the chef fisting in the kitchen this morning. (My sister took it!) Use the password Urethra and Bob will sing “Row, Row, Row your lubricant” as swiftly as he possibly can. Tell him Gene said so!