My filter sometimes malfunctions

Surprisingly enough I do have a filter. I say what I think is an appropriate choice of words to say, unfortunately not everyone else agrees with what I think is appropriate. Example: ‘butt-ton’ apparently isn’t a better word for ‘fuck-ton’ I said this at work once last spring, I’m still confused on why. I stare off at walls all the time recreating conversations I had trying to understand what I said wrong. Most of the time I don’t understand so I continue to make mistakes. Are they still mistakes if I don’t understand why they are mistakes though?

This post is about my new year’s resolutions fyi. If you’re confused on how I switched topics that have nothing to do with each other don’t worry it’s like that great saying mental health humans are told all the time “you’re not alone.” My mind takes me to different topics every 30 seconds or so. If you were to look at my past text conversations or Facebook messages, not only would you be violating my privacy but you would also wonder how I switched topics so fast. I’m feel like I should apologize to Stranger Danger every text because our conversations go off into different topics all the time. It sucks because I tend to forget what I texted last so when I have a new text from Mr. Danger I have to remember what was the last WOWBK I told him. I told him he deserves a ribbon for putting up with my odd texts, but I wonder if he really understands how grateful I am for his friendship…I’m not crying, you’re crying.

My New Year’s Resolutions for 2015 were the following:

  1. Stop saying “sorry” for things I don’t mean.
  2. Write as much as I can, the good, the bad, and everything else.
  3. Continue to accept myself as I am. Which includes the CRAZY. Only change if I want to change.
  4. More tattoos.
  • I am still saying “sorry” a lot, but I did stop saying it for things I didn’t mean. Now when I say “sorry” I mean it. (I say sorry a lot)
  • I did write a lot, mostly about the bad. In October I deleted my tumblr and made this blog. So I can check that one off!
  • Uhh accepting myself…I never really accepted myself. I’m working on that. I did start to change, which was really code for getting better mentally. When you have been at rock bottom for a year, it fucks a lot up. It’s hard living like that.
  • I got 2 more tattoos! Changeling and my Potato!

My New Year’s Resolutions for 2016 are the following:

  1. Release my demons that I have been hoarding in my mind. There’s a lot of them, but hopefully I’ll slowly empty that “room” in my mind.
  2. Improve my baking skills.
  3. Understand more about myself, even the shit I don’t want to deal with.
  4. More tattoos!

To end this post here’s thing I sent Science Lesbian through Facebook messenger. I’m not being violated since I copied and pasted it on here. “My grandma let me have the stuffed boobie I feel honored that I have a stuffed boobie. I can say “sup I have a fake boobie” to people now. Then they’ll look at my chest and try and figure out which one is fake and I’ll just giggle and show them my stuffed blue footed boobie.”

My fake boobie!I’m holding up my lap desk because it makes a great back drop when needed.

~SirChangeling

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